Myke & Me Plus ThreeFour: A Pain in My Butt...Literally and Figuratively

(FYI: If you don't want to hear complaints, don't read this entry)

Tuesday:

Tailbone. Coccyx. Whatever you want to call it. That has been the source of my most painful pregnancy symptom. I'm not sure what causes the pain but I'm assuming it has something to do with the way the babies are positioned. It must put pressure on that area. I had this same issue with my first pregnancy. It happens if I lay on my back for even a minute or sit in certain positions. Only the pain comes when I try to move out of that position. It's excruciating. I feel like a turtle stuck on its back. If I even start to roll one way or the other to get off my back the pain shoots through my tailbone and feels worse than labor pains. I've never had a bruised tailbone but I've heard they are pretty rough--I'm guessing the pain is something like that.

While I'm on a roll venting my frustrations, let me just update you on my doctor's appointment today. First of all, let me just say that I'm OVER being pregnant. Have I mentioned that already? I'm uncomfortable, I'm heavy, my stomach is stretched to maximum capacity, I get heartburn, moving is a struggle, and I'm just irritable in general etc. To be perfectly honest, I went in to my appointment today kind of hoping that maybe I would have high blood pressure or that the baby's fluids would look a little low...anything that would make Dr. Schrimmer decide that it was time to evict the boys from the womb. I know that may sound horrible and selfish to wish for, but I'm just being honest. I'm thrilled to have made it past 35 weeks. I spent so many weeks resting and staying off my feet, being told every week that I probably would never get this far, and here I am...still pregnant. Yes, I know that is a blessing...but now I'm done. Emotionally. Mentally. Physically (well, I guess I'm not entirely done physically considering they are still in there). This has been a long journey...started with two trips to the ER due to spotting, six weeks of daily spotting due to three subchorionic hemorrhages , months of modified bed rest, having to ride around in a hoover-round scooter (little did I know how good I had it! This was before strict bed rest), then right when I'm in the 2nd trimester, feeling a little better and starting to get back to "normal" life, I end up with a shortened cervix that puts me in the hospital on two separate occasions, makes me endure 4 shots (with large needles) of steroids in my hip/upper glute area, 10 weeks of strict bed rest, etc.

Next Day:

It's now Wednesday. I decided not to publish the above post yesterday because I was just too tired to continue and wasn't even sure if I should bother posting an entry that consists only of me complaining. Yesterday I was someone to stay clear of. I had nothing positive to say. After a good night's sleep I'm feeling better. Dr. Schrimmer did let me schedule a C-section or induction but the earliest he will schedule it is May 16th. I'll be 38 weeks. The thought of having to wait nearly three more weeks just did me in yesterday and I was basically in tears. However, I know the longer I go the better for the babies, the more certain we can be that their lungs are ready for the outside world, the less chance they will spend time in the NICU, etc. I have to take the focus off myself and my aches and pains and think of the good that it does for the boys. That has just been somewhat hard to do because I think I'm still in denial that I'm about to have two more babies. It doesn't seem real at all. I've never fully wrapped my head around the idea and at this point I'm sure I won't until they are in my arms and I realize they are real.

Dr. Schrimmer did say that if he were to take these odds to Las Vegas he would put all his money on me going into labor BEFORE May 16th...but I really do have my doubts that I'll be that lucky. I hope he is right, though! If I do go into labor on my own before then, I hope I can get to the hospital in time! Labor and delivery with Chloë was so fast and furious I didn't even have a chance to wrap my head around what was going on. She was basically almost born in the car on the way to the hospital. With these guys we are dealing with breech and transverse positions so, unless they do some moving in the near future, a C-section is imminent. I want to be there in time so I can at least be awake for the surgery and not have to be knocked out for an emergency C-section.

Now that I at least have a date set and am in the waiting game, I'm no longer taking it easy as much. I should probably take it easy more and enjoy these last few weeks of sleeping at night, being able to read a book, being able to sit down and put my feet up, but it's easier said than done. Yesterday I went on a semi-long walk in the neighborhood for the very first time-- just me and the dog. The entire thing was probably a mile, but that's A LOT for me. It was nice to get some fresh air and just clear my head.

Pictures from the walk: